Something Other Than Work

It’s easy to be so focused on learning the culture and finding or focusing on a new job that one forgets to foster other interests. It can seem indulgent to spend time on a hobby when one doesn’t have a job yet. But for people who already had hobbies before moving, it can be helpful to seek out ways to continue them.

In my case, it took a few months, but I decided I wanted to resume playing football (soccer). I’d played basically my whole life, and missed it. A quick search online called up a women’s football club that trained a 45 minute walk from my house, and was looking for goal keepers (my position). I attended a few trainings and was eventually invited to join. Now I train every week, and play one-two matches a week. That’s up to three times a week when I’m with new people, getting exercise, building a skill, and being social.

If you are the person with a job, it might be a bit harder to initially carve out some time, but it’s possible and I’d argue important. But if you are a partner who hasn’t found work yet? I’d argue it’s critical. I’m fairly introverted, but being alone all day most days was even a lot for me. Yes, I’d get out to lunch with friends at least once a week, but I already had a group of friends here from when I lived in London before. But they all have lives and jobs and things to do.

If one doesn’t find at least one small group of folks to spend time with, it can put a lot of pressure on a partner to be the other’s entire social life. That’s not entirely fair. I love that on Tuesdays I get out of the house and my partner has the place to himself to do whatever. Sometimes the club meets for drinks during the weekend. I’m not obligated to participate in all the things, but it’s nice to have options, and nice to meet people and start to develop some friendships.

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